The Dangers of Social Media

Social media is a beautiful thing.  No longer do you have to dial long-distance to stay connected to your friend who lives across the country.  No longer is a four hour drive the only way to know what your friends are doing in other states.  Social media platforms have the ability to create unlimited connections ranging from surface level to as deep people want them to be, depending on how open and transparent people choose to be.  However, the danger in these connections is that people only share what they want to share with friends.

Social media allows a person to write their story however they want people to read it; this story may be very different from the actual life this person leads.  Herein lies the danger of social media.  Hypothetically, If I log onto Facebook and see all of my friends posting positive things and showing off their brand new houses and engagement rings, I am going to try and size myself up to those people if I'm not mindful.  My next thoughts might try to wander off and be about how my life compares to theirs.  Yeah they have a big house, but I heard _________.  I wish I could buy my girlfriend that nice of a ring, but ________.  These thoughts can cause much harm to us if we allow them-- especially if we are in a tough time in life and we view everyone else as "much happier" and "having a much easier life than my own."  In these moments, you are allowing yourself to forget that you are only seeing the side of that person's life that they want you to see.  They may be going through the very same thing as you but choose not to share this on social media.  Your friends may in fact be going through something way tougher in life-- you just can't see it because they don't show that side to you.  

Don't get me wrong, I love happy stories.  I love to see people's happiness and joy in life.  There is a lot of bad and evil in the world, so I love to see feel-good stories.  Life is too short and uncontrollable to harp on the ugliness of it.  Bottom line: there is no win in comparison [a message Andy Stanley often preaches]. Stop measuring your life by comparing social media accounts.  Life isn't about likes, shares, retweets, or number of online friends.  Life is about being you, not someone else.  Life is about finding happiness in your life, not by finding joy in "mentally one-upping" someone on social media.  Do use social media as a resource, as a place to enjoy the happiness of your friends, and as a place to stay connected no matter where you go.  Don't use social media as a way to determine your happiness, as a way to rank yourself, as a source of pride, as a source of emotional detriment.

4 Reasons Why You Should Have a Mentor

4 Reasons Why You Should Have a Mentor

Growing up, I didn’t want help; I knew what I was doing and when I didn’t, I faked it [I’m still guilty of this on occasion].  It wasn’t really until college that I truly understood the benefits of other people’s influence in my life.  It wasn’t that I had a major epiphany— it was more so that I finally trusted that people around me cared about me and wanted to make an impact on me.  I knew this all along, but college was the beginning of me opening up my eyes and seeing that other people really can help me become a “better me.”  Over the last three years, I’ve had four or five mentors and I am eternally grateful for all of them.  I’ve learned more about myself, people, and the world around me in the last three years than I did in my first 18 years on earth.  This list isn’t exhaustive by any means, but here are four reasons why I believe everyone can gain from having a mentor.

The “Been there, done that” Idea

We’ve all heard it, over and over again.  We’ve all heard the saying because there’s a whole lot of truth in it.  Whatever stage you're in right now— be it middle school, high school, graduation, marriage, parenthood, mid-life— this is as far as you’ve been in life.  A mentor has been farther.  A mentor has experienced the entire stage and now sits on the other side of it.  They possess attitudes and approaches that we can learn from as we go through each stage of life.

Perspective

My perspective is my perspective and your perspective is your perspective.  These are almost fully molded by our upbringing and surroundings and it is really hard to see other sides of issues sometimes.  A mentor can potentially provide you with another set of eyes with which to see something. A mentor may be able to give to you a different mentality about an issue in which you had never thought of before.  At the very least, a mentor can be someone to discuss perspectives with and possibly even disagree with you about perspectives.  No matter the scenario, you are able to learn more about yourself and do so with a trustworthy person who wants to see you succeed.

Networks

Mentors can be a link to a whole new network to you.  Simply put, relationships drive the world.  More often than not, people get jobs based on who they know rather than what they know or how many times they submit an application.  I am not suggesting that you seek out mentors simply for who they know, but I am suggesting that you use your mentor as a resource.  One of my current mentors is helping me in my quest to land the right job coming out of college.  He has given me people to contact, recommendations, and insights I would otherwise not know. 

Self-Awareness & Accountability

It is said that the things that you don’t know about yourself are some of your most identifiable traits (good or bad).  You need someone who can call you out on things and help you to improve yourself.  Trust me when I say that I am not one to take criticism well.  Why?  Because it’s hard for me to admit that I’m wrong about most anything.  At the end of the day though, I am super appreciative of someone who challenges me and constructively criticizes me in a way that is honest but not demeaning or ugly.  Because if you can’t see your flaws and you’re not willing to let someone tell you about them, how are you ever going to mature or develop further as a person?  Accountability essentially goes hand in hand with self-awareness: it’s all about trusting someone that knows you and sees all of the potential in you.

I can’t tell my mentors enough how impactful they’ve been on my life.  In the same regards, I can’t tell you enough how impactful a mentor may be on your life.  It’s just one of those things that you have to first believe that you need.  The person you are today is great, but the person you can be tomorrow has the potential to be greater than today.  

Guest Blog: Why Mindful Marketing Still Matters

Today's blog is a guest blog written by Doug Norwood.  Mr. Norwood is the President and COO at Swarm Agency, an online marketing agency in Atlanta, GA. You can see his LinkedIn profile here and his Twitter handle is @DougNorwood.

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Have you ever counted the number of software tools out there which are designed to purportedly make you a better marketer? I have and I can tell you exactly how many are in the market. Zero.


Marketing tools don’t make you a better marketer any more than power tools make you handier around the house. Can they make you more creative? No. Can they make you a better writer? Nah. How about more efficient? Yes! Can they insert life into a broken process? Absolutely! And therein lies the magic.


To be fair, I don’t personally know any software developers making the “better marketer” claim. But as buyers we rely on those companies to sell to us in a way so we can truly understand the value. So while we hope for improvement in our skill sets, we are getting something perhaps more critical. Process improvement.


Some people say “revenue can solve a lot of problems.” I tend to lean toward the belief that “process can solve a lot of problems.” I know of no company that has achieved long term revenue and growth success without a seasoned, proven process firmly in place for achieving results.


The tools and solutions are ubiquitous. From basic marketing automation to amped up social, partnership and influencer platforms all the way to full-on, blown-out marketing suites. You can’t swing a dead app in this business without hitting one. Yet, despite the broad innovation within the majority of these solutions, marketing still comes down to the fundamentals:


* Is your messaging concise?
* Are you talking to the right audience?
* Are you creating value?
* Are you selling to your customers in the way they want to buy?
* Are you following up and maintaining the conversation in a meaningful way?


You have to be aware of your audience, be conscious and considerate of their time and be sensible in your approach. In other words... be mindful. If marketing identifies the need and selling satisfies the need, it’s only logical that mindful marketing begets mindful selling. Or at least it should.


Being in the agency business, we get a ton of inquiries from software companies pitching their solutions as an effective way to solve a problem, which will then catapult us to the fast lane of servicing our clients and whoosh! Success! All while creating a nirvana of benefits for our clients. Sounds pretty good. With Atlanta’s exploding tech industry we really do try to entertain as many demos as possible so we can be knowledgeable and fully prepared to act in the moment one of our clients states a need.


The vast majority of demos we sit through are mindfully executed. Yet, we did sit through one recently that had the eerie tone and foreboding presence of a used car sales pitch. The product itself was solid and seemed to have value. The demo, however, was somewhat perplexing and was made all the more curious when the messaging turned from marketing and selling the product to offering us the “Manager’s Special” if only we would commit to the deal that day. They put us on hold for seven seconds (literally, I counted) and came back with the offer. Apparently, the sales manager just happened to stop by the office before heading out west to open the company’s next big sales office. In those fleeting seconds he came to fully understand our business and grasped our vision so clearly he unflinchingly authorized a “buy now and get your first three months FREE,” deal. I wish I were kidding.


This company didn’t have enough confidence in their product to really raise the value bar. They heard our objections and immediately went to their deal-of-the-day close. That was a mistake and a lost opportunity. While the product was interesting, the company and the person pitching wasn’t mindful in their approach. They didn’t know us, our business or our clients and they took the lazy shortcut of a one-to-many presentation. Their approach thwarted our interest in the product and ultimately the opportunity to work with many of our clients.


So, will this ill-directed software company survive in the long run? I suspect they will. But a candid follow up conversation with them allowed us the opportunity to give them some very direct feedback about their approach. They seemed receptive to our insight but we may never know if it provided any real value to their process.


We hope it did. In our increasingly collaborative world, being mindful is a two way street.

What I Would Tell My High School Self

1.       Smart meet smarter – No matter where you go or what you begin after high school, chances are that someone around you will be smarter than you.  Learning and being smart are two good traits to have, but there are so many more pieces to your personal puzzle.  It is extremely important for you to be relational, to communicate well, and to be able to handle all sorts of situations.  These traits can prove to be much more meaningful to peers, classmates, employers, etc. 

2.       You don’t know what you’ve got ‘til it’s gone — Don’t just wish high school away.  We often get into a rhythm of wishing and hoping for the next upcoming thing.  Stop.  Enjoy your days in high school.  The days after those will come in due time.  Enjoy each day and don’t wish it away because you are seriously just wishing your life away!

3.       Make your relationships meaningful — Make sure the relationships you are focusing on are ones of value to you and others.  Relationships built around alcohol and drugs and whatever else, you know those aren’t sustainable and/ or healthy.  Build connections with the people that really benefit you and you benefit them: teachers who can write letters of recommendation for you, like-minded friends who can push you to reach your potential, and people in the community who can help you when you’re ready to enter the workforce.  

4.       Your work is far from over — Don’t think that you can rest on what you’ve accomplished in high school.  I went off to college thinking, I worked hard in high school so I am fine with making a B in college.  After I saw that first B on my college transcript, I got a bad taste in my mouth.  Each day is a blessing and not a day to rest on past accomplishments; if you do that, you’re robbing yourself of future successes in whatever you’re doing.  So with that said, keep up the good work.  Five years after high school, people will be much more concerned with what you’ve done in the last year than what you did in high school.  Not too many intriguing stories start out with the words, “Well, back in high school ten years ago…”

5.       You’ve done a lot, but so have your parents — Take a moment to thank your parents.  They’ve put in thousands of hours driving you to and from school and activities, going to the store late at night in order to finish your project that’s due in the morning, shopping for outfits you outgrew in a year, and so on and so forth.  Your parents/grandparents/guardians have worked so hard to make sure you have everything you need.  

6.       Things aren’t going to fall into your lap — Be proactive about what’s next.  I thought because of the scores and GPA I had, colleges were going to be knocking down my door wanting me.  HOW FOOLISH I WAS.  Utilize the knowledge of your teachers and guidance counselors.  I wasn’t even going to apply to UGA, but I listened to my counselor’s advice and I know now that I am where I am meant to be.  So start checking out schools-- use your excused-absence days to go and scout out schools.  Begin communicating with their recruiters; put yourself out there.  Just don’t wait until the last minute to start applying!  Procrastination will put you way behind the curve!

A Gap to Bridge

As a young lad, I was raised not to take handouts from anyone.  It was understood that I was supposed to be able to do anything and everything for myself when the right times came.  I am grateful for the way my parents raised me because I know I will be able to take care of myself in most situations.  I am even more grateful for the realization I had years ago that I will never be the "best me" if I am only learning from myself.  By this I mean we ALL need influences on ourselves that extend far beyond our own thinking, young men especially.  It is important for young men to surround themselves in good company and it is equally important for young men to be impacted by men who have already been where they are now in life.  Mentorship is essential to personal and career development, yet I don’t think nearly enough mentoring relationships exist for young men.  There two are factors that men and young men alike must overcome in order for mentoring to better benefit the male population.

We live in a world today that is full of pride.  Young men are taught from a very young age that asking for help is for the weak.  With that mentality, boys grow up believing that they must do everything on their own in order to be successful and confident.  On the other hand, older men have society in their ears telling them that advancing personally is more rewarding than helping others.  This world tells us that success is found within ourselves and provides more happiness than giving back to others.  As a collective society, we have lost the understanding that helping others helps us just as much, if not more, than helping ourselves.  

Secondly, there is simply a lapse in communication between boys and men of different generations.  I firmly believe there are boys wanting to be mentored and there are older men wanting to mentor younger men.  These older men know they have great advice that can benefit younger generations and they see the potential of them.  This communication may be linked back to the pride issues in that young men don’t want to seemingly “ask for help” and older men don’t want to reach out and somehow look “weak.”  

Here’s the bottom line: mentoring doesn’t just benefit one party.  There is growth on both sides of the equation.  I am extremely grateful for all of the influential men in my life who have in some sort of way been a mentor to me and I know that God placed them in my life for great reasons.  My mentors have provided me with the means to grow in all facets of my life.  

To the younger men: Just when you think you know it all, that’s when you know the least.  There are men around you that have advice, tips, tricks, goals, and attitudes that can help you grow into the man that you want to be and exceed the goals you have for yourself.

To the older men:  There are younger men hungry for help in life; there are young men near you that can greatly benefit from what you already know.  Don’t get so caught up in your own life that you forget about from where you came.  Think back in your own life and recall that man that you always looked up to—think about the man who helped you out at some point.  Don’t you want to be that guy for someone else?  And if you didn’t have that man who helped you in life, you know how hard it is without help.  So why not change that reality for a young man in need?

New News

Arguing over television network biases is so 1990's. Everyone knows that conservatives worship Fox News and liberals love CNN and MSNBC. Because in truth, one station tells nothing but the truth while all of the others feed their audiences cold lies. With the growth of social media, the argument has now changed from television network biases to who can break stories quicker (consumer's have really ditched the mental question of "is this biased?")-- Twitter, especially.  People's Twitter feeds provide them with news just as much, if not more than TV sources. This is because of the ease of access and the connectivity of people on social media. Twitter understands this shift in learning and they have just introduced a new tab on the platform titled "Moments."

The goal of every Twitter user is what? Going viral, of course. Breaking "new news" is not something reserved for veteran reporters anymore. Instead, it is open to anyone with a social media account. Concerns over network bias are long gone and the concern now is all about SPEED. No longer would we call the news station about a car crash or a dangerous situation. We just grab our phones and start capturing and tweeting. This is the whole thought behind Twitter's Moments: events happen, people react by tweeting/ filming, and then Twitter groups all of these people's posts together and we have a fully matured news story with thousands of people interacting. Old school conventional news would say, "Let's create a big story and HOPE that we get thousands of people interacting."

Moments is all about quickness and simplicity. No longer do we have to sort through hashtags, follow certain users, and/or look up news outlets. No, everything we need to understand about the world's biggest stories at any time is under one single tab. The easiness of Moments is very intentional, as Twitter is trying to stay relevant by making it easier for casual users to get connected and hooked to Twitter. With a large amount of people over the age of fifty joining Twitter every day, Moments makes a lot of sense and requires very little from users.

A lot of people smarter than myself are claiming that Twitter is dead or it is nearly dead. With the looks of their current stock prices, it seems that they may be correct. Is it possible that Moments could save Twitter? Is it possible that a tech-driven company simply collecting and grouping other people's media could save itself from death? I guess only time will tell; Twitter's final Moment may be of Twitter's final moment.